I love thinking about the way we think, it’s such a possibility to change and reinvent ourselves in every moment. We talk about how simple it is, the concept that in every moment we have a choice to think about life in whatever way we want but this as I’m finding is so much easier said than done. Based on our experiences in life and inutero we come into this world believing things to be a certain way, then relationships form and they reinforce our beliefs or contradict the established beliefs, morals, ideals that have grooved their way into our neural pathways. At the end of the day what has happened is, we are hard- wired in a certain way based on in my opinion nature (being our karmic path and lineage) and nuture. Some of our wiring allows us to feel expansive and empowered while other types of wiring makes us feel constricted and small.
As I walked the other day with my baby and three dogs, believe it or not I was less distracted than I am typically when we walk. Whether it’s the constant catching up on life conversations my sweetie or the running and playing of my three year old son, I rarely have the time to deeply connect with nature. This time was different. As I headed down this beautiful windy path, noticing how green everything appeared and feeling and taking in all the sensations with my eyes, skin and ears, I allowed what one of my mentors had said recently to really sink in and I felt it in every inch of my body. It was along these lines, the grooves of our brain that began forming even before we were aware this was happening are very deep, the path is tended and it feels safe, we know what to expect at just about every turn, whereas when we move off the path the newness is so frightening we don’t hang out there as long as we maybe could. Hence, rewiring some of these tendencies that might not be our favorite attributes about ourselves. So, with this in mind, I started to step off the path, at first it felt liberating and freeing, the sensations became more intense as the damp grass touched my legs and I could touch the bark of a tree with my bare hand. I felt very alive and then I got scared and literally found myself inching my way back to the path. I tried this several more times, witnessing myself from above just giggling to myself at how habitual we become, how any discomfort or unknowing can bring up a lot of fear. We have such a strong pull dragging us back to our tendencies that we keep ourselves stuck.
So, what I’m doing to start to play with these grooves of my brain is I’m beginning to form new ones, I’m doing things differently. Drinking more tea instead of coffee, doing less asana and more meditation, I’m taking a different route home from work, eating almond butter instead of peanut butter, rearranging my shower schedule and changing the way I habitually get out of bed (which is quick and now very slow). The beauty about this is that, by starting with the small stuff the bigger stuff can begin to shift too. I can alter the way I respond to the guy who cuts me off, the way I react to my sweetie when I’m hungry and getting irritated. I’m branching out just like my brain, loosening the reins on the monotony and the knowing of every moment and loving every minute of it.